blah just put me out of my misery..... please!

If it where Christmas I would say BA HUMBUG and just for the record I'm usually a fairly up beat optimistic person

Today I'm really down I don't know it its PMS or my Fng diet or what but let me tell you...IF i decide to pass on the cookies one more time only to find out that I haven't lost any weight I'm going to SCREAM REALLY LOUD! I lurve carbs and have been good about not eating them don't get me wrong I still have grains just not the cookies and cakes. I even started to go to the gym and am not loosing weight granted I've only gone since last Tuesday and (not weekends) but srsly I'm so over weight that I should be able to breath wrong and it fall off!!!!! 5 years ago I was able to stop drinking pop and lose 10 lbs now I stopped drinking pop stopped eating most of the crap I ate and going to the gym and still haven't lost any weight.. well I lost 1.4 fucking pounds srsly that really bites the big one (yeah and the none swearing isn't going so great today.) And really I know your all going to come back with the same crap the (we're all on the same diet plan)girls from work who are already 200 (OK exaggerating there) pounds lighter than I am not working out and still drinking pop AND STILL LOOSING 10 POUNDS A PIECE IN THE LAST 2 WEEKS are going to tell me that it is good and if I feel better than I should keep doing it (which I am cuz I do like going to the gym its like me time and I love it. They have an aqua class 2 days a week !) but srsly they don't even understand what it mean to be fat and the one girl is super excited to fit in to her "skinny" jean (which I am very truly and sincerely excited for her to cuz I've been there before) but my skinny jeans are about 100 light years from now. I do fell more energetic and do feel better BUT I want to see results. My husband says: "You've only been doing it a week give it some time." To which my reply was simply bawling.. I mean really what else is there.

Were going on a cruise in May and I want to look good more than any thing I don't want to be the girl that everyone goes back and talks to there friends about .. you know the whale that was in a swim suit and beached on the swim deck.